Self Talk regarding violence

When is violence perfectly acceptable behavior?  I rail against violence and how horrible is the person who beats a child or any other who can not defend themselves.  I scream about how wrong it is for an elder person to be beaten and harmed.  I rail against a child who is harmed by any other. 

Yet I turn my eyes away from and I even condone others who do this same as I abhor.  I praise and support and even feel pride for ones that I know have exactly exacted this type of violence against humanity and say.... we are justified.  Are we justified when the child spills a glass of milk?  Are we justified when the elder stumbles breaking a dish?  Are we justified if a woman does not have a perfect meal on a table at the perfect time?  Are we ever really justified?

Is not a life being ended by another person murder?  When is murder not murder.  We, I believe, are very confused.

This picture was taken well after the actual murders when we dropped an atomic bomb on Hiroshima and taken from http://www.pickchur.com/2011/02/hiroshima-64-years-after-the-atomic-bomb-was-dropped/

These are the questions that I ask myself then turn away, adjust the temperature on my thermostat then pour another coffee to go about my day as if these things are not as real as the bruises that I see upon my neighbors body after her husband's anger.

We are the Butterfly

The Butterfly effect, theory of Chaos was given to us by Mr. Edward Lorenz (may he Rest in Peace) in the 1960's in order to attempt to explain how weather might change.  He accidentally (if there is any such a thing) gave us an understanding much deeper than the weather.

This Story goes as this :  A Butterfly in China flaps its wings and the resulting tiny change in the air accumulates with other factors which eventually becomes a hurricane in the United States.  This is Chaos theory in a nutshell, one action (regardless of its size) is important because each action is received by another which eventually manifests into something bigger and unseen by the originator. 

I am not a mathematician, just a simple philosopher so can not even begin to show you the equations which went into Mr. Lorenz's proof, however all the proof I need is everywhere around me. 

The simple understanding would be that we are wanting to make a meal but in order to do so we need to have heat to cook with, we need the correct type of groceries, we need transportation to the store or a healthy body to grow the food then process it ourselves, much goes into making a meal.  Chaos theory basically says that it all began somewhere and the cumulative tiny somethings became our evening meal.  If even one of the tiniest things changes so does the result.  For instance not enough versus perfect conditions of rain or nutrients which changes the flavor of the vegetables which are used to create the meal.  It is each variable in its development which contributes to the end product, it is considered chaos simply because everything is depended on something else which if looked at would resemble a chaotic mix which has variable results.  The mathematical proof, however, shows that with the exact same variables the exact same result will happen but it must be exact.  This world is not made to be exact, it is made to be diverse, wonderful, colorful, and delightfully surprising.

We do not, often, enjoy being fully responsible for the events in our lives but we are.  This understanding shows us clearly that there is a cause and effect for simply everything that happens in our lives.  It also helps us understand that by changing just one tiny, little thing, we can change the entire outcome of an event.  We are in complete control at all times of our lives to decide how to react to the current flutter of the 'butterflies wing'. 

I am thinking of some of the worst possible moments of my life and how was I responsible for those?  Well, I was not responsible for that persons decision or reaction to whatever happened which created the event that collided with my own life.  I am, however, in complete control of what I choose to do now that it has happened.  When that butterfly flapped its wings starting a chain of events which eventually collided with my life, I then could decide what to do with its result.  I can choose to allow it to define my future or I can use it to catapult me toward wonderful dreams rather than a nightmare life.

Every day, we flap our wings which sets into motion a chain of events.  Even if we choose to never rise from our beds a chain of events has begun which will collimate until a result eventually transpires.  Along the way toward the result, however, are numerous points in which we can change the direction into another possible event.  We can choose to smile at a stranger walking down the street and never know that the other person was on their way to commit suicide because he/she had lost all hope in humanity.  Perhaps that smile was just the flap of your wing that caused the other to decide not to go home and beat his/her child out of frustration with the world.

We will rarely know how our action or lack of reaction affected the whole but be assured that everything you/I do is a link the the chain which creates our lives.

We are the Butterfly

Mistakes and Conditioning

Today we are thinking about how many mistakes are made by our lack of understanding or sometimes just a plain good ole mistake.

When I made a mistake by taking that job where the Boss was just a major pain in the butt, far more demanding than I was willing to give, what did I do?  I found another job.  Mistake over.  When I made a mistake by having the heat too high while trying to fry an egg, what did I do?  I threw out the crispy mess, washed the pan, turned down the heat and fried a new egg. 

When my Parents made mistakes by imparting into my mind things which just are not true, what did I do?  I took these mistakes as something that I had to live with.  When the scientists said that our DNA was everything and no matter what we desired, the DNA we were born with would determine our fate, what did you do?  You accepted this as truth even though we now know it was a mistake. 

The big question is why am I not treating others making mistakes with their interaction with me the same as when I, myself, make a mistake? 

Those others who made mistakes with me most probably just tried to give me wisdom from their own experience or what they thought was right.  This does not mean that it still holds as a truth today or that it even applies directly to me.  Perhaps it is time to stop being angry about the mistakes made with me and just go about my life accepting the wisdom of my own truth of myself at this moment.   Perhaps it is time to wash that pan and throw that crispy mess out. 

Instead of accepting that they did something to me, I am thinking they just made a mistake.  This mistake is one that I can either continue living with or let it go. 

Change

We believe or have come to understand that when a person says..... "I will accept this no longer" it does not mean the same as "I love you no longer".

Even when we begin loving ourselves enough to no longer accept a certain treatment from another, the love is still present.  Love never goes away but sometimes it expands to include ourselves also.

It is in this expansion to ourselves that love can find its full expression and if that includes those that we love traveling our journey with us then it is magical.  If, however, love has found expression within self and does not include the others continuing along our journey, it has not failed. 

Love never fails. 

The New Rug 08/27/2013

Today we wrote our beliefs (or the beginning of them) for the first time.  It was quite scary and we questioned our very sanity.  We know that the life we live is very real, tangent, can taste it, touch it, feel it and live it but it seems so incredible that still we want to question it.  It is so far outside of what we are taught is normal that... well we can only hope our children learn to accept gifts out of thin air better than I do because they always amaze and surprise me. 

As we wrote earlier, We are (as a species) learning to accept that "Thoughts are Things".  Well, this could possibly be some type of psychosis or a part of mental illness OR it could be real with the shift humanity is going through.  We laid down for a nap trying to calm our mind about the validity of our life findings but more so sharing them with the world.  We as a species are so new to this evolution that those believing in this way are seen as completely insane. 

When we finish our book, "Life Between the Cracks - a New Dawn"  there will be a lot of people questioning our sanity even though we know (my Partner living it with me for the past almost 16 years) that every word is true with much of it also being witnessed by her.  But we took a nap, exhausted from the fear of how that blog would be received and the writing of it reinforced our lack of internal strength at completing and publishing that book. 

As I sat on the stoop watching the dog play this evening, our neighbors Son came over with a rug thrown over his shoulder saying, "Mom got this for you and cleaned it for you today".  Then he brought it in, waited patiently as I picked up the former rug (which did not completely cover the hard wood floor), swept under it then helped me lay the new rug.  As incredible as having a rug of this quality delivered to your door as a gift the rest of the story makes it understandable.  For the past week, I have been wanting to polyurethane that floor because it is so dull and just can't seem to find the time or money to do it (refinishing a floor is messy).  The only message I can find here is the Divine saying, "There problem solved... now write your book". 

What a magical world we all live in. 

Human Evolution as seen through our Eyes

This blog is difficult to write because it is going to have views in it that are controversial.  We identify as Christian in faith, you may now choose to continue reading or discontinue.  Why do we identify as Christian?  Firstly we pay no mind to the fact that the book called the Bible was plagiarized from other works.  Why?  Those works were plagiarized from other works which were plagiarized from the Universal Consciousness itself.  Each tells the same stories in different words, some can accept the wording of one book but not another so the same story has been rewritten over and over hoping that one of the versions will get through our closed minds to germinate.

We try to live our lives based on the story of the Christ and only give any measure of acceptance to what we call the "red words" within the book called the  Bible.  We do not believe this is a holy book, it is simply a guide as are the other books with the same teachings.  Unless you want to define the word Holy as being something from the Divine to ourselves, inspired and pure in which case you, my friend are also Holy.    The "red words" are as close as we can come to what the message of The Christ is.  The other  books of the Bible are either history or another version of what they believed The Christ meant.  In many cases an attempt to bring about the Christ Consciousness much more quickly than evolution will accommodate were attempted but by doing this much of the message was lost in that current mind set.    So to each the "red words" will be slightly different depending on what we are lacking within ourselves.  We believe that The Christ consciousness lives within every person (or individual spark of the Divine) upon this planet today.  Some are allowing it to grow within and others are rebelling against it but it does not matter because it is still there.

What does this have to do with human evolution?  Everything.

In my short lifetime there have been more changes, more quickly than in any other recorded history.  It is not only the material world which has changed drastically.  Our way of perceiving the world has also changed.  We, as a species, are becoming more aware of various cultures and much more sensitive to each other.  This creates a "rewiring" of sorts with in the brain allowing us to see what we could not see before.  Imagine being the Christ and knowing what he knew with no mentor?  We are much in the same boat currently and trying to find our way, as a species through these beginning stages.

To try to understand what is going on, the world has labeled the dis-order with many names trying to organize it in a comprehensible way.  We call Mental Illness a Dis-Order which means out of order.  To the world we are out of order.  The mentally ill question the validity of what the orderly accept without question.

We believe that those labeled mentally ill are only the first stages of the expansion of the mind.  Of course, it will be difficult.  The first attempt at making an automobile did not go smoothly and this rewiring is no different.  Why do we believe this?  It appears to be World Wide and to have come on strong with no warning or preparation for it, quite naturally.  Is this not what evolution does? Some re-wiring has been less than desirable as in the case of the "criminally insane".  Has this not happened through out our history?  Species come and go with those most desirable being kept while the others culled?

Let me back up for a moment.  There has been a lot of warning for us but we just have not paid attention to it or we did not believe it applied to US.  Over the ages many books have talked about this moment in time, including the Bible.  We just always thought it was off in the future somewhere or a fairy tale or anything except the possibility that it is here now and we are living it.  It is here my friends and like it or not, we are living it.

The "Mentally Ill" have many exaggerated traits currently.  We see this across all spectrums of the various labels given to those who's minds have spontaneously re-wired themselves.  This is natural, it it were not they would be able to cure us.  We can not be cured because we are not ill, we are only the next step of evolution.  One of the traits of the "Mentally Ill" or those who are the first wave of this new humanity are that we are loving, kind, generous people who worry about the affect we have upon others.

Why is this not a spontaneous evolution or downloading or rewiring of the human race?  It is because the mentors have not had the opportunity to help others going through this re-wiring thus preventing any more chaos than is absolutely necessary.  Imagine if everyone were able to just spontaneously understand that truly what we think we receive?  This is a truth but with this power also comes responsibility which for the very young (think in terms of giving this power to a child) can have disastrous consequences.

Here a tiny example (we have been given the gift of seeing between the cracks, a compartmentalized brain sees things in a different way than most).  We fostered a little 3 year old boy this past winter.  We did not tell him that he could not create what he wished.  We also did not tell him that he could.  We (my Partner and I) do not believe what happened to our dog pen or guttering was an accident.  He had watched the story of the 3 little pigs on television and took great delight in repeating... "I'll huff and puff and blow your house down".  A few days later (he had been repeating this phrase several times each day and laugh because it was funny to him) a huge storm came up with wind unlike even what had been experienced while receiving the inflow of a hurricane earlier in the year.  During that event the dog pen stood tall and stable.  I was not frightened because I had asked (silently) that we be protected while this child learned the lesson which is all that is needed.  This event however, with the little boy saying "I'll huff and puff and blow your house down" resulted in the roof of the pen being torn completely off and the pen laying on its side in the flower bed.  He was very frightened and we told him that it would be better if he did not say that again.  He, however, was quite excited that this had happened and he (without our saying so) believed that he made that happen.  He continued saying his phrase, "I'll huff and puff and blow your house down" and a few days later another storm came through which removed the upper rails of our guttering around the house.  The next morning we took him out and again, asked him to stop saying that.  It seemed to satisfy him and he discontinued saying that and nothing else has happened to the house sense.  None of the other houses in the area had been affected by the winds as our home had.   We also wonder about our bed bug episode because he was very fond of saying, "Good night, Sleep Tight, Don't let the Bed Bugs Bite".  Sigh..... 

So what is currently being considered "Mental Illness" is simply human evolution in its infancy stages and the modern world attempting to understand.  What created the re-wiring?  It is impossible to say, perhaps early inoculations/vaccines, perhaps some way our food was altered, perhaps just simply that the human race is in this stage of evolution.  It could be anything really but that is unimportant.  What is important is that those who are considered "Mentally Ill" speak our truth because we are the uninitiated mentors for all who will come after us.  We are already seeing many of the positive effects through our questioning old parenting methods, holistic medicine, and most important of all, how a little Love can heal ourselves and the entire planet. 

We only have a limited amount of time to bring Love, consideration and self responsibility to the front as the number one thought which should dictate virtually every action we initiate because truly, What we think, We create.  

Speak up even if the World is not ready to hear what you have to say.  It is important.

Rainbow Bridge Poem

 

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge. When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind. They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster. You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart. Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....  Author unknown...

A Theory about a Theory

December 21, 2012 New Beginnings

It happened so subtly, the world at an ending and a new beginning.  The Mayans were well aware this day would come and come it has.  Lovingly they left the riddle to be solved by those who would understand its true meaning.  It came and went with very little fan fair except for money made by folks whipping emotionally susceptible persons into a near frenzy. 

What few realized was that the date in question never was about a physical ending or beginning.  It only identified a date in which we, the human race, must make a decision regarding our very future. 

On December 21, 2012 I stopped at precisely 11am to sit quietly in meditation for world peace, as did countless others around the globe, during all minutes of every hour for the 24 hour period marking the new beginning.  All over the Earth we sent the same emotion enveloping this little planet in a blanket of protection, the message was only one word LOVE.

On this very important date, we had a small foster child staying with us.  He was accustom to my meditating as he fell into sleep at both nap and bed time but this was different, it was in the middle of the day.  We turned on a television program that he enjoyed, poured a glass of milk and made a sandwich in preparation while I explained to him that I needed quiet at exactly 11am to fulfill a promise. He quietly watched television beside me and waited patiently.  When the meditation period was complete he asked, "Do you feel better now?"  I replied, "Oh, honey, you have a wonderful life ahead of you.  Yes, I feel much better now".

We live in a vibrational universe of which science is just now beginning to resolve the similarities between the physical world and the nonphysical world.  Everything is held together vibrationally with like elements becoming attracted to each other which ultimately become a thing, person, sky, or even a complete world.

We have always been aware of seasons, constellations, astronomical events and their effect upon our physical world.  We are also aware that even though a particular event is likely to occur on a particular day, our human will trumps the day, if we choose not to experience what is happening.  This day was no different in which humanity as a whole was given a choice.  Are we evolved enough to choose peace?  Are we evolved enough to choose love?  Are we evolved enough to proceed as an evolved species?

The day came and went with most people not even aware of what had happened.  The watchers see currently what will eventually become clear to every human being upon this beautiful, colorful and very alive planet.  The watchers came to be upon this planet called Earth at precisely the moment when humanity would make a decision.  The decision to continue in a war like fashion not ready for the truth of what each is actually capable of or to step slowly onward toward a world of endlessly beautiful possibilities.  To continue into the world which is coming, a war like species would not have been allowed to proceed and evolve into the full miracle which is called Human Being.

Love is the way, it is the emotion of vibration which holds the very fabric of the universe together.  On December 21, 2012 humanity choose the direction of the future.  Now we simply wait. 

Life - It is All a Game of Make Believe

Every moment of every day we are making this thing up called life.  This moment is not exactly like the last, there are subtle changes.  Sometimes they are very small and creep up on us like a new letter on this page as I write it.  Because of typing a new letter, this moment is not exactly as the last.  Sadly, I can not just hit the backspace button and erase the things that I don't like which have happened in this moment from a past moment.  Would I want to though AND if I hit the back space is that letter really gone?  Is it possibly still there only frozen in that very moment of time IF I could roll back the film to review it?  

If I were to hit the back space on my life then would I require myself to make up that situation once again because I would also backspace the wisdom of it?  I believe that we all come to experience something and sometimes we have pretty hefty ideas of what to experience such as my current life and possibly yours.  

Moment by moment we make up our new life and each moment is in fact a new life because it is no longer exactly like the last moment.  Just as our bodies are not in this moment exactly like the last, our skin is shedding, possibly we comb our hair or take a bath.  Even if we do nothing our body is expressing itself without our conscious effort, hair is growing, oils are softening our skin and so on.  

Life experiences happen in this very same way.  Slowly without our even realizing it a decision right now makes up our new life in the next moment.  Sometimes we decide to keep harming ourselves because we are not finished gaining the wisdom of our idea for this life.  Sometimes we decide on simple things like what to eat which effortlessly will bring about our new life in the next moment with our body processing the food.  Life experiences are exactly this way and our decision or our thought or our effort of this moment builds our new life in each and every moment.

Wishing you a day of consciously choosing your moments and building your life to be what you need it to be.

Between the Cracks - Perfectly Normal

It has occurred to us that we are perfectly normal when we compare ourselves with others who think similarly to ourselves. 

My Right arm has hurt for several days now.  It just feels as if it was over used but for the life of me, I could not remember working it that hard.  The mind did its thing, what if it is the beginning of a heart attack?  Rejected because it is on the right side, not the left.  What if there is a blood clot in there? Rejected due to no circulation loss.  What if the M.S. Symptoms are returning?  Rejected due to not being under that tremendous stress.  Then it hit me while brushing my hair this morning.  Early in the week, I decided to begin brushing my hair for 100 strokes each morning to help with oil production on an overly dry scalp.  I ALWAYS use my right arm to brush.  Bingo... problem solved.  From now on I will brush 50 strokes with the right hand and 50 strokes with the left so both arms can build new muscle from this activity. 

The above paragraph might seem abnormal for "normal" people.  The mind taking a simple overly worked arm and nearly deciding to call an ambulance is quite normal in my world.  This is why I have also learned to wait to act until I am more certain which could be dangerous in its own decision but lets not go there right now.  To my peers, others who have run away minds, this is a perfectly normal thing for our minds to do. 

In fact with my own peer group it would be abnormal not to consider many possibilities to a singular event.  How can people live, make decisions based on fact if they never look at an event from many sides?  Is the decision then an uneducated guess?  Is it an opinion half heartedly thrown together?  It is simply abnormal in my world. 

We are brought up comparing and to a degree it is healthy.  We compare, for instance, where we were 10 years ago to where we are today then make decisions regarding possible paths to achieve what is desired in the next 10 years.  If we are on a weight loss program, we compare our weight this week to that of last week then make adjustments if necessary.  Sadly we also compare emotional well being to completely unknowns.  I simply can not know what another thinks in the privacy of their own minds.  For all I know they may be completely Crazy just like me and be too afraid to talk about it.  Of course, in my mind that is dangerous because we go about thinking they are not crazy only to find out later that they are.  What a let down.

So we are all perfectly normal in this world.  We are a perfect representation of ourselves, authentic, honest and doing our best in a world that is also doing its best right along side of us.  Perhaps when we realize this then single out one by one the laundry list of items internally that are making us unhappy, we can find happiness going against what the world sees as "normal".  It takes a lot of courage to admit who we really are with all of our vast emotions in a world that seems to value everyone being a cookie cutter representation of each other.   

Wishing everyone a Perfectly Normal Day.

JUDGEMENT

Judge not lest ye be judged. 

One of the tiny 11 laws that I live by.  Today it dawned on me that I have been living in contradiction of this law.

I judge no one else.  Some others, I chose not to be around because their belief system and my own is vastly far apart.  To be together for an extended time both would suffer.  Some others, I choose not to be around because they have hurt me in some way and to continue being around them would not benefit either of us.  This does not mean that I judge what they will do in the future only that I have seen who they are in the past.  

I suppose, being completely honest, I do judge some... they are the others that choose to harm and this most especially would concern children.  These folks, if I had one wish it would be lucid dreaming of what their victims life will be because of their actions.  Dreams that will never fade.  In fact, wouldn't it be nice if we could all have lucid dreams regarding our interactions with others?  We would then understand fully our positive impact on others as well.  So that judgement is not even a true sentence as it would benefit all of us to be able to see the long term effects of our interactions with another.  Of course, to do this would be so time consuming that there would be no time to fully live our own lives.

In my quest to obey this internal law, I have neglected a very important aspect of it.  It is judging the self.  Thinking about it, I judge myself for EVERYTHING.  If the house is clean, I judge myself for not spending the time on something else.  If the house is dirty, I judge myself for not taking the time to clean it.  If I say something to another, I judge my own ability to be clear enough that it not be taken in a way other than it was intended.  I judge my weight.  I judge the fact that my hair needs to be colored and then again that I feel the need to color it because the dye damages my coarse locks.  I judge myself for making a decision about anyone or anything else.... check, double check, triple check... did I just judge that person? I judge my ability to write.  I judge how I care for my animals.  I judge simply every aspect of my life.  

Now, I'm not talking about making decisions about the above items..... I judge myself as right or wrong on the decision I've made.  This clearly indicates that I do not trust my decisions to be what is correct for others.  Oh the decision may be correct for ME but oh my what if I hurt someone else?  What if someone else does not enjoy my writing style?  What if... what if... what if..

SCREW IT... This is insane.   I'm done judging myself.... it is against one of the 11 laws that I live by and I will do it NO MORE.

Bridging the Gap

Our emotions are EVERYTHING.  We pay attention to so many things outside of ourselves when the only thing that ever will really matter is what is on the inside.  So many of us are busy making sure the house looks just right, being upset because our furniture isn't perfect or the kids tracked in mud onto a perfectly clean floor or the yard isn't mowed or we need to loose a few pounds or we need to gain a few pounds or we need more muscle mass or the list goes on and on and on.  A lot of attention is focused on what the outside looks like yet, often, so little on the inside.  It is on the inside that literally everything that will ever happen within our lives happens first.  Without this, nothing happens of lasting value.   

What occurs on the outside does matter but only because it is an indicator to the rest of the human race of what is going on inside of ourselves.  The outside can be and often is a mirage, a front which does not tell that true story of the people who live there.  By constantly gathering more, bigger, better things in life, we as a race often believe this person to be wealthy.  Somehow we have come to believe that wealth is an indicator of a successful person yet IF we were able to see within that person the story may be a completely different one than what is being viewed externally. 

We run around trying to fix what is on the inside by creating the outside look to the world or what will benefit us to the greatest degree.  OH it is true, people who drive the nicest cars, are at a perfect weight, wear certain clothing, keep their bodies well groomed  and live in certain neighborhoods are in fact treated differently than those who lack in one or more of these areas.  I know this to be true as part of my life path has been to be one of those people.  We concentrate so much energy on the outside that falling into bed exhausted there is no time to even consider what is going on internally.  We struggle each day running as fast as we can to try to fill the gap but all that looms before us is more struggle. 

There is a gap, however, between the external us and the internal us.  Thankfully, we have come to a space in time where this gap is being addressed by the vast majority of the human population.  We are beginning to ask the big question.... "If I have all of these things, why am I not happy?"  The simple answer is that nothing we will ever purchase or acquire on the outside will permanently affect the inner being that is us. 

No church or teaching or upbringing or any other thing from the outside can ever create permanent joy, peace and happiness.  This is personal between you and you.  Only you (I) can find the path which will lead us to this state of being.  There are as many path's to these states of emotion as there are people on the face of the Earth today and all are correct, all will lead us to where we wish to be.  The teaching must resonate with us internally and as we are all on different spiritual levels there is no one size fits all.  We KNOW when the teaching is correct, it just "feels" right.  When it feels right do not follow the teaching, run to it, immerse yourself in it, drink in every thing it has to help you but do not at any time look to the teacher because teachers are on the outside.  It is the teaching itself that we need to build that bridge. 

Bridging the Gap is that moment when we stop, look around ourselves and admit, "I have tried so very hard.  No one on this planet has tried harder than I.  Still I am not internally experiencing the emotions desired on a consistent basis".  At that moment we realize there is a gap that needs a bridge between our external selves and out internal selves.  We can blame anyone that we wish to and yes those folks did something horrible to us but this blaming does not bring peace.  Why?  Because it was only what that other person did that created the noticing of that gap in our lives. 

I consider many great teachers over the eons and how each of them (to my knowledge) experienced that moment where the gap in their lives became known to them.  At that moment there was a choice to either ignore the gap or look at the deep crevice between where they are externally and where they are internally.  After spending some time considering this gap they made a choice to tend to it and build a bridge between the external and internal.  Then these teachers had a knowing to share with the world and it was their destiny to do so.  What bothers me so about the followers of these teachers is that generally we, again, attempt to fix the internal with the external but now being a follower of this or that we want it to fix the internal issues through acquiring a label. 

No label, nothing external, no teaching will bridge the gap between our external and internal worlds.  Only we as individuals are able to do this.  When we are ready, we will find the suitable teaching which will give us a general path to follow and be ready to do the work involved.  Just as we acquire skills for employment, skills are acquired within internally. 

Everything we could ever want, desire or hope for is inside of us.  I know this sounds cliche but it is absolutely true.  Here is a little story for you.  I am not nearly where I want to be internally so do not think for a moment that I believe myself to be a great teacher as this is not my own internal truth.  I am simply a seeker of my own personal truth as we each are. 

During a period of great internal growth, my body grew with it which is undesired.  It is so undesired that I refused to purchase clothing to cover my now quite large body.  OH I had clothing but only what was absolutely required for whatever function we needed to attend.  Knowing that I should purchase a larger array of clothing it troubled me greatly.  I told my internal self, "No I am NOT going to spend one dollar on clothing for a body of this size.  If YOU want me to have clothing fine bring it on".  Time passed and I forgot all about this conversation.  I went about life, enjoying the seasons, enjoying moments, working on my internal self, working on my external self etc.  One day my partner comes home from work and asks what size I am.  I tell her and ask why?  She says, "Well a lady at work has lost a lot of weight and wants her larger clothing to go to someone who will appreciate them".  It turns out that the clothing was/is exactly my size.  Within a very short time boxes upon boxes of clothing arrived.  A wool coat which I had looked at in a catalog and desired but refused to purchase for this size was among the beautiful items.  Opening the boxes I was completely amazed that this woman had the very same style that I have and simply everything in box after box were items that if I were to purchase clothing for myself, I would have chosen exactly those items.  I sorted the clothing, some was a little too large but a lady down the street had one day remarked to me that she only had 2 pairs of black pants for work and continuously washed them to keep clean for work.  There were 4 pairs of black pants in her size in those boxes.  There are some clothing that have been reboxed being a couple of sizes smaller than my current size which tells me that the Divine I AM believes it is possible that I will be losing weight soon.  These are lovingly boxed and sitting in the extra room, waiting. 

Some would call the above very true story a miracle but because I actively attempt to see between the cracks of what is and how it came to be, it is clear to me that what was going on internally brought about the external material possession of these clothes.  How did this happen?  That is an entire other story and one for a new blog someday.  OH, I have many other stories exactly like this one but we will save those for another time.  It is time for you, all of us to begin amassing our own stories.  It starts with bridging that gap.

By bridging the gap between the external and internal everything we could possibly desire will come but it starts with us internally.  As a species we just have somehow gotten off track and decided that happiness, joy, peace come from the outside which is light years away from the truth of this matter. 

Wishing you a happy, joyous time while building your bridge.  You are going to love it, yes you will.

Balance

Our lives are intended to live in balance.  When out of balance we experience distress.  To accept this we need only look around and at our physical selves. 

Our bodies are created to operate perfectly in balance with equal limbs on each side of our trunk.  In addition we were created with excess which can serve us if the balance is lost.  We were created to survive and thrive as a vehicle embodying a portion of the Divine I AM. 

If nature is out of balance we quickly experience the negative results of the event which created the imbalance.  This same balance is required for our human bodies to survive/thrive both physically and nonphysically.

Human's are complex emotional beings capable of many emotions both pure and mixed.  The mixed emotions are often an out of balance interim emotion in which we have not made a pure decision regarding the event in our lives. 

When we experience out of balance emotions this translates to our physical well being as while in this physical vehicle we can not separate one from the other.  We become one with our physical vehicle upon entering it.  Conversely if our physical vehicle is out of balance we experience an equal emotional event. 

Each emotion that we possess as human beings is important.  To neglect one is to create a system which is out of balance.  Love is as equally important as Hate.  It is through the emotion of Hate that we choose to turn to that of Love as in we hate the environment we are in therefore we choose a different environment which will bring us closer to one in which we will Love.  Peace is as important as Anger.  Anger is not a negative emotion.  It is the emotion which will bring us to action toward a peaceful solution to an event.  Only when we are out of balance are problems created within our lives.  Pain is an unwanted emotion, however it often clarifies (when we spend time observing it) what is needed for health. 

Neglecting the unwanted will not bring about lasting peace within because the emotion has not been resolved.  We can pretend that the negative does not exist yet this will only work if we turn away from the event toward a positive state of restoring balance.  Because we are in a state of either balance or imbalance at all times, events unresolved will continue presenting themselves to us over and over until the imbalance has been resolved internally as well as externally.  Once we have resolved the imbalance within, this presentation will automatically cease as balance has been restored to ourselves internally which translates to the external. 

Our experience here on this Earth is everything that we have chosen it to be.  Yet we have forgotten as a species that this is a world, a universe, of balance.  We rush from the unwanted grabbing onto straws for a quick fix to remove the unwanted only to find the same situations representing themselves time and time again.  Only when we stop, listen, come to a different decision while accepting the interim of a mixed signal during the adjustment can the new positive situation be permanent.

Grief is perhaps the most important emotion we possess yet it is also the least desired and the most feared.  This emotion will present itself time and time again during this life time.  It may be grief over a loved one passing.  It may be grief over a situation that did not turn out as we had hoped.  It is only the emotion of loss of some type.  Grief is only one side of that balancing emotion of joy.  If we can begin understanding the balance of each emotion, working through the interim of unbalance becomes easier.  When Grief is experienced, joy is just around the corner once we resolve our feelings of internal loss, remembering the joy which is the truth of this emotion.  Had we never of experienced joy regarding that event, grief would not be possible.

May we all strive to live in balance and when unbalanced find our balance quickly once again.   

Healing the Inner Child

Most people believe that the eldest child has it best in a family for many reasons but what happens when one of the Parents is also an eldest coming from a very abusive (physical and emotional) background?

My Mom came from just such a family with 6 children on a poor farm in the middle of the Midwest United States on a very dirty, bumpy road.  She retold stories of her upbringing that hurt my heart to hear.  She vowed to never allow her children to be beaten or abused.  Just how she was going to accomplish this was through sheer will.  What was neglected, however, was time spent healing her own inner child.  Rest in peace Mom, I know you did the very best you could.

My Father came from a near by farm in the same township.  They were friends for life.  His upbringing was very poor and he desired to never be in the position of his family not having enough money for essentials.  What he traded was time spent with his family to accomplish this dream.  Rest in peace Dad, I know you did the very best you could.  

Taking the time to heal our own inner wounded child before having our own children may be the most important event in our entire lives.  If we did not take the time to do this before having children, there is no better time than right now to begin the healing.

We are all wounded, regardless of our position within the family.  These wounds can be inflicted in more ways than can possibly be fathomed.  Bottom line is that there is a wound and until it is attended to, it will not heal.  At the most inopportune times this wound will split open with no warning, seemingly no cause, no trigger.  Everyone wonders, what is wrong?  They were not present when the wound was inflicted and most often we have buried it deeply so long ago that even the person experiencing has issues understanding why this emotion is so deep-seated.  

When that wound opens, to ignore it is not healing the cut upon our tender inner child.  Most often, we feel vast amounts of guilt for having these feelings.  This also does not heal the wound.  Often, we feel shame for harboring the negative, ugly emotions deeply toward those that we love the very most.  If you can, try to remember that the child you were felt these emotions at their respective logical emotional developmental age.  Your inner child is not experiencing the emotions from an adult perspective. 

What if Love is the very issue?  At some point we felt unloved.  Perhaps this is true, perhaps it is a perception, perhaps we have proof, perhaps not.  It does not matter, we can debate the validity of feeling unloved until the cows come home but it will not heal that inner child's wound.  Only listening to that inner child without rebuke, without the continuous explanations, unconditionally and fully tolerant may the inner child be truly heard.  Once the child is heard, only validating those emotions has a chance of healing.  

That wound has been festering for a very long time, untended.  It is time to attend to it now.  No more band aides or ignoring, hoping it will just magically heal on its own.  It is time to attend to that wound as a loving, caring, adult with perfect authority over this child.  It is time to attend to that wounded child with compassion, love and tenderness which you also have perfect authority to do.  The one person you will never (through eternity) be able to get away from is yourself. 

My parents had a very unique style for dealing with their children feeling unloved.  What they did not do, ever, was validate that feeling of being unloved.  Rather than address the issue, it was buried in many ways to (in their minds) prove that this was not true. 

As an adult the inner child now believes that it is our duty to become an adult and put away childish things.  We are this child, however, and that experience is a part of our lives regardless of years.  

I am an eldest child, as was my Mother before me, of two beautiful daughters.  In many respects my Parents did their best to overcome what they saw as obstacles.  Thankfully they were very forth coming regarding their own rearing which has enabled envisioning their personal transformation through life much easier.  

This is not about my parents, however.  This article is about healing our inner children and the importance of it.  As an adult we have the ability to do this but not until we listen to our inner child as if it were a stranger without the conditions of emotional attempts to defend those that we love.  The unloved inner child is unloved, regardless of any other circumstances. 

Until we love, honor and care for our inner child, life can not be fully lived, appreciated and experienced.  The inner child is with us for life, this is where immense curiosity, joy, spontaneity and wonder arise.  There is possibly nothing in life that is more important than healing any emotional wounds still open within us as adults.   

It takes courage and strength to be our own best defenders, our own best friends, our own hero.  You can do this, of that I am certain.  Best of luck and congratulations on healing your inner child.  

Get Mad and Get Busy to have a Peaceful Life

Personally I am sick and tired of everyone just saying that to have a peaceful life we just need to forgive all that is bugging us.  This blog will eventually get to the 'peace and love part' but the path there may not be an easy one if we have been stuffing a whole bunch of garbage during our life.

I tried just forgiving and forgetting.  Did not work on some portions of my life.  What happened is that I sunk even deeper into depression adding the fact that I could not do this.  It is what all the books say and generally life is fairly Zen for me but there is a time to get mad and get busy.   It is a trap to fall into believing that anger does not have its place in our lives.  If anger did not have an emotional place then we would not have it, it would have evolved right on out just like gills (according to Darwin).

I tried meditation and for the time I spent in a deep meditational state, all was right with my world but eventually I had to go to the bathroom.  So this did not work on some portions of my life.  Staying in this state did not allow responsibilities to be fulfilled. 

I tried praying... Forgive me as I forgive others?  Well this was not working!  It was now eroding my relationship with the Divine.  

There are very few things that I did not try.  Being too depressed to even figure out what I was depressed about, what should a person do?

GET MAD

 It makes no difference at all what we get mad at (as was recently personally discovered).  What is important is unstopping that cork that is keeping us stuck. 

After getting mad, GET BUSY.  Once the situation that helped unstop that bottled up anger is released take care of whatever issue caused this.  Completely obliterate the problem that caused that anger then do not stop there.  About to lose your car? House?  Take 3 part time jobs if that is what it takes but obliterate that problem.  No clean clothes to wear?  Put them in the bathtub to wash them if you have to but obliterate that problem.... get MAD.  Another person created the problem?  Oh don't even waste your time on him/her because anything you do can be used against you (keep reading).  

KEEP GOING.  Now that the bottle is uncorked find the next issue that has been buried and go to war with that one.  This is completely about you.  Yes it has nothing really to do with whatever or who ever created this in the first place.  Everyone else is going to go on with their lives, we are the one stuck.  An Ex piss you off?  Well, if he/she is no longer in our lives then there is nothing to save.  Get Busy.  Go to the gym, buy yourself some new clothing, get a hair cut, do your nails, play with your make up, learn to strut that new body and then hope your ex sees you when it is done.  Yes, just hope.  Don't even waste your time hunting him/her down to show them because believe me what comes around goes around.  Why stop there?  Write a book about your experience and make some money off of it.  Go back to school to receive your doctorate and be certain to send the invitations to the graduation party to all of your mutual friends.  Oh, there are many things that we have within our power to do which will gain the ultimate revenge which is the ex asking, why did I ever let that one go?  What was I thinking?  

This takes time but we all know that revenge is a dish best served cold.  By the time you are ready to be seen by the others who inspired the depression to begin with there is a good probability it will no longer be important.  

Now is when we can smile and feel that Love for ourselves shine onto the world surrounding us.  

Believe it or not I am grateful that this happened because now that vulnerability has been closed within myself.  Without the lesson the truth within would never have been found.  

   

Trash in the Park

While pulling up to the garage the white paper drifting across the park caught my attention.  Just 30 feet from all of those empty fast food containers sat my dumpster with the lid fully open, inviting any trash that might want to join in.

First I thought, that isn't my problem and how dare someone just throw their trash around, leaving it for others to clean up.  Then came the anger.  Charging to the edge of the park nearest the offending trash, a neighbor came to the end of his driveway at the alley.

"Can you believe how people just throw their trash here where our children play!" I yelled.

He just smiled and nodded.  I'm pretty sure he was trying to gauge my level of stability at that moment.

"I wonder if they live like this at home!!"  I continued to rant.

"No, probably not", he drawled in a country accent, "Their houses are probably real clean, they left their trash in the park."

Now I was laughing....

"I'm sorry you had to see my little moment".  I apologized

His reply?  "Sorry if I interrupted you".  then grinned a hillbilly kind of gotcha grin. 

I'm still giggling and yes the offending trash is tucked safely away in the trash bin.  Probably a very good thing I did not witness who did this.  Thankfully, I have neighbors that keep an eye out though so even in my crazy moments...... I gots back up if needed.  LOL 



Walking to the back door it hit me...... how so much of my life has been cleaning up other peoples emotional trash just thrown onto my tender psyche.   OK now I'm REALLY MAD.  Probably a very good thing that those who did it are out of sight today. 

From now on, when others either intentionally or (more often than not) unintentionally trash up my beautiful day... I'll just point them to the nearest trash bin and tell them that I don't want their garbage. 

And yes this is how my mind works.... between the cracks.